Blog Before Wicket

Just the place to chat about cricket and poetry. to see what I'm up to; with comment & ideas

Sunday, November 26, 2006

Inflatable Women

Should Inflatable Women be allowed to Watch Cricket

In for today's play I wrote

"Near us a group go too far. Instead of a ball, they have a ball with an inflatable woman. For some reason this is also against the rules, even though Cricket Australia publicised this series with a thirty foot high Giant Warnie they pumped up and took to England just in case anyone in Australia didn’t happen to know the Ashes were back. ....The police move in. They arrest the inflatable woman who by all accounts refused to give her name, address or any other details and kept her integrity intact under intense scrutiny till one prick too many. She may well return tomorrow disguised as a blow-up policeman."

What do you think? Are inflatable women not cricket or don't they have the rights as you or I to watch so long as they behave themselves reasonably?


Day Three Stumps 84 for 2 - still in with a chance in the dog-house
actually 181 for 1 but 84 for 2 would've have been slow yet not too bad had England followed on


Friday, November 24, 2006

Statto question about Warwickshire Bowlers

Mid session between lunch and tea the game changes. Australia know they shouldn’t lose, and England are looking more at a draw. Ian Bell comes on after tea to bowl in tandem with Giles. Here’s one for the Frindaliser Drive which powers the Strineship Enterprise, and all you cricket stattos. When was the last time two Warwickshire players bowled in tandem for England?

A Brief History of Poetic Predictions

Day One Stumps 7 for 348 - not sure who to - actually 3 for 346, close with the runs at least
Day Two Stumps 174 for 3 - am sure who to, needing around 300 to avoid the follow-on - actually 53 for 3 slight overestimation of runs scored and required

Day Three Stumps 84 for 2 - still in with a chance in the dog-house


Thursday, November 23, 2006


When it comes to sports, everyone seems to be believe in omens.

Last week just before leaving England our goldfish, Hoggard, carked it - not so good for the poms.

Yesterday the Barmy Army trounced the Fantatics in front of seven camera crews as a pipe-opener - not so good for the Aussies.

What are your omens, superstitions, charms, rituals and articles of faith that you carry in order to bring fortune upon endeavour?

And do they work?

Day One Stumps 7 for 348 - not sure who to

Monday, November 06, 2006

Should poets be drug-tested?

Last week while waiting to see a specialist about viral arthritis, I read in the papers how two Pakistani quicks had been banned for taking proscribed drugs. According to The Guardian, Shoaib Akhtar had been taking so many supplements - Red October, Maximaximal, Yingtangtiddleyepo - he'd should've been sponsored by Superdrugs.

I'm going to Oz, funded by Arts Council England, to write poetry about the Ashes Series. My consultant was pleased I was off the steroids for my arthritis - now just a memory - but said I'd still fail any sports drugs test for months to come.

'Should poets be banned for taking drugs to enhance their performance?' I asked.
'Definitely not,' she replied

What do you think? Have your say below..... Should poets be exempt from drug-testing? Should they be allowed to break the law in pursuit of the muse....

....Stacks of great poets from Rimbaud onwards have taken proscribed substances to augment the muse. See "Widdicombe Corner - A quick guide to pharmalogically influenced work from Samuel Taylor Coleridge to Irving Welsh."

"Which do you prefer? Grass or astroturf?"
"Don't know, never smoked astroturf." Joe Namath, New York Jets Quarterback